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Engagement pics Pt. 1

My awesome brother-in-law took pictures of Mr. Hercules and I today.. here's a couple previews. My other awesome bro-in-law will be taking more pics next week :)

 
  
  
  
  
 

oil pastel painting

Work has been vacillating between being incredibly busy and being incredibly dull. In the off times (and at night when I get home) I have been doodling and playing around with my new water soluble oil pastels. These are far from being finished, but I'm very pleased with the  way that the colors blend.
  
Be still, sad heart, and cease repining;
Behind the clouds is the sun still shining
Henry Wadsworth Longfellow


I also just bought some Staedtler pens that are waterproof, and VERY fun with watercolors! (Ann, you're gonna love what I'm doing with them!)

Spring

This time of year is pretty much my least favorite. If there's something that will go wrong in the year, it's usually around April. I've been trying to change my mindset on that, and so far, it's worked pretty well to my advantage. I'm getting married in April, and we've got a new (to us) Ford Escape to cruise around in, which is terribly fun and exciting. :)
It's been blowing hard enough to force me to bow my head to the wind when I walk. I wake up in the morning to snow, and although I'm a jeans and sweater kind of gal, I've been spoiled with motorcycle rides the last couple of weeks, so snow isn't becoming. I complained to a friend of mine at lunch today about the wind, and her eyes lit up and she became very excited and said, "Oh, but this time of year is the best! The wind is blowing, the earth is waking up, and the trees are making love!"  
  
I'm trying to change my attitude a bit. My resolution for the year was to find beauty in everything. Today it's my mini sketch/quotebook and my ring. Isn't it the perfect ring?
 

Coming home from work is my favorite time of day. Last night, Ty spent about an hour sitting on the couch with me, my feet in his lap, while he let me babble about my day. I have been feeling so grateful for things in my life the past few weeks--grateful for my family, my parents, for Tyson, my job. Grateful for answers to prayers--even though they ABSOLUTELY do not get answered in the way I thought. (Ever heard that Sarah Ban Breathnach quote--Ann, I know you have--"Do you know how to make God laugh? Try telling Him your plans.") But lately I know that I am the most lucky, blessed woman in the world.


I bought Mr. Hercules' ring today.


Only 35 more days :)

Show Your Heart


With as much creativity as you can muster, show your heart in:
1 picture
1 poem
1 song or piece of music
1 phrase or quote
1 item of clothing
1 place
If you want to join in, feel free :)

My heart in 1 poem:
let it go-the
smashed word broken
open vow or
the oath cracked length
wise-let it go it
was sworn to
go
let them go-the
truthful liars and
the false fair friends
and the boths and
neithers-you must let them go they
were born
to go
let all go-the
big small middling
tall bigger really
the biggest and all
things-let all go
dear
so comes love
e.e. cummings

My heart in 1 song or piece of music:



My heart in 1 phrase or quote:

"All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well."
Julian of Norwich


My heart in 1 piece of clothing:
(I'm cheating and doing 2 :) lol)




My heart in 1 place:
 
with him

Calling a halt

I'm in a funk.

I'm getting married in 37 days and starting to feel the stress. I woke up this morning thinking that there's no way this is all going to work out, and I seriously want to just run away, have our parents there when we get married, and call it good. I want it to be beautiful, but I wasn't one of those girls who dreamed of what her wedding would be like when she grew up--I planned on being a nomadic Earth Child for most of my adult life. Wander around with my sketchbook, camera, and books, and be content.

Unfortunately, that's all I'd probably ever be--content.

With Ty in my life, I have this new feeling--it's called joy. What a new experience!

I know everything will work out, and that my ennui is stress-induced, but for today here's a few quotes that are getting me through.

"There is more wisdom in your body than in your deepest philosophy." - Nietzsche

"Grace strikes us when we are in great pain and restlessness...Sometimes at that moment a wave of light breaks into our darkness, and it is as though a voice were saying: 'You are accepted.'" - Paul Johannes Tillich

"In Italy for 30 years under the Borgias, they had warfare, terror, murder and bloodshed--but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance. In Switzerland, they have brother love, 500 years of democracy and peace, and what did they produce? The cuckoo clock." Graham Green, from The Third Man

"Once must accept that one has 'uncreative' moments. The more honestly one can accept that, the quicker these moments will pass. One must have the courage to call a halt, to feel empty and discouraged." -Etty Hillesum

"Discontent and disorder [are] signs of energy and hope, not of despair." Dame Cicely Veronica Wedgwood

For Today... (once again, stolen from libby)


Outside my window... boring blue... not a cloud or any grey to be seen *sigh*

I am thinking...
I'd rather be painting and cooking

I am thankful for...
being happy with myself, my life, and my decisions. I'm thankful for my amazing Mr. Hercules. I am thankful for love.

From the kitchen... warm biscuits, maybe some pork chops for dinner?


I am wearing... grey slacks, black sweater, happy green tank, and a bright necklace

I am reading... House of Sand and Fog

I am hoping... for rain

I am creating... a more peaceful work environment

I am hearing... "Vapour Trails" by Trespassers William

Around the house...
my shoes, slippers, books, CD's, and extra clothes to change into after work at Ty's. I thanked him the other day for always making room for me at his apartment. He told me, "There was always room for you. I just hadn't met you yet." I love him. :)

One of my favorite things... sleeping in on Saturdays, then having breakfast with Ty (always French Toast, bacon, scrambled eggs, and cartoons)

A few plans for the rest of the week... do laundry, draw, play games with Ty, bake lots of lovely things!

Here is a picture thought I am sharing with you...


 
Spring is coming. I promise.


First Five

I stole this from Libby and think it's a great idea! :)

The first five people to leave a comment on this blog will receive something made by me. However there are some limitations:

1. I make no guarantee that you will like what I make :)
2. What I create will be just for you
3. It will be done within a year (might take a while)
4. You have no clue what it is going to be
5. I reserve the right to do something really fun.

Edit: I'm taking the "catch" out of it. Only post again if you want to :) 
There is a catch. If you choose to do this, you must post this on your blog and be ready to make something for five people too. This will be fun! When you receive the fabulous item I make you, you must post a picture of it on your blog.

Mrs Mister Hercules

For any who haven't heard yet, Mr. Hercules proposed to me in the middle of a gorgeous blizzard last night!

We took a drive out of town and just up the mountain a little bit to one of my favorite spots. It had been raining, but once we got further up the mountain it turned into a blizzard. We were listening to music ("You Found Me" by The Fray, if you want the specific details--which many apparently do! lol), and then got out of the truck, rolled down the windows with the music still playing, and tried to catch the falling snow on our tongues. After a minute, Ty hugged me and told me he loved me and then got down on one knee, right there in the mud and snow, and asked me to marry him, please.


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Of course I said yes. (I hope he was able to understand me through my sniffling and crying tears of joy)

I tried to take a picture of the ring, but it didn't turn out really well, so here's one I stole from the jeweler's website:


It's titanium with an aquamarine stone. I don't like diamonds, and Ty's not a big fan of them either, so I was really happy with the aquamarine. :)

It was the perfect moment with the perfect man. I can't wait to be his wife!

Czeslaw Milosz

Last night I couldn't sleep and didn't feel like reading any of the books I've started. Instead, I started reading Czeslaw Milosz again.

It may not be the best insomniac reading (or the cheeriest), but I fell asleep!

Here's a few of my favorites:


Do ut des
He felt thankful, so he couldn't not believe in God.

Longing
Not that I want to be a god or a hero.
Just to change into a tree, grow for ages, not hurt anyone.

Portrait
He locked himself in a tower, read ancient authors, fed birds on the terrace.

For only in this way could he forget about having to know himself.

Supplication
From galactic silence protect us.

You know you're a member of my family when:

... There are more computers that people in the house

... Your little brother calls you up to say that he finished building a converter so that he can play his WII on his computer. (just because he's that smart)

... When your boyfriend starts saying "suckafish!" because he's been around your brother too long.

... When your sister starts calling your boyfriend "Captain Awesome" instead of Ty because she thinks it's funny (Yeah, Ty says "Awesome" a lot, but not that much!)



... When you frequently hear "Yeah right!" or "That's a CAT5 cable! They can't do that with that!..." and other such jargon when watching movies with the men of the family (Dad, Joe, John, Ty, Adam...)

... When your sister refers to you as "a Lorelai" and your boyfriend as "a Luke."

... When every girl in the family has an unnatural fear of pigs because of that stupid story grandma would tell us all the time as children.

... When you need little provocation to light up some fireworks. Just give us a lighter. And, if it's not a holiday or legal, give us the lighter, we'll have a good time anyway :)

... When half of you can rotate your appendages well beyond the normal range.


... When your life could be described as a (maybe less exciting) version of NUMB3RS. Because, while beating at a Coke machine for your soda that's stuck, your little brother begins to explain the reason your soda isn't coming out. When you glare at him, he picks up a phone book as a visual aid and says, "Ok, think of it like this..." (and goes on to explain the inner workings of the Coke machine, asking afterwords, "Do you have paper towel roll and some duct tape? I'll teach you how to pick the lock with it." And no, not so I could steal soda--I wanted to see how it worked, why it was getting jammed every time I wanted root beer, and just to be a more informed person... :) lol  And yes, that conversation did happen. )





I love my family :)

You keep the air in my lungs, floating along as a melody comes...


Lately I've been spending my lunch breaks in the bathtub. I feel like that Yellowcard song, "How I Go" (or like Albert Finney's character in Big Fish)--I feel like I'm going crazy and drying out if I don't spend a certain amount of time in the bathtub every day. I've been known to take a shower + two baths a day. The world is a sane place if you're in water.



Today while I was in the bathtub, I was thinking about all the things I would have told my 10-year-old self if I had met her.  As I thought, I came up with more things my 10-year-old self would tell me if she met me. Looking back, I seemed more fearless, and more of a free-spirited dreamer. Of course, I'm still Ty's free-spirited "Earth Child Little Girl," but I allowed for the possibility that absolutely anything could happen. (Believe me--I'm the girl who wanted to be a violin-playing, volcano-studying, space-exploring, USA-presiding, cake-baking, flower-arranging, greenhouse-growing, astronaut/astronomer/physicist. If you don't believe me, just ask my mom and dad lol)


I think the 10-year-old me would tell me:

Play in the rain. Don't be too afraid of anything (Ty would say including pigs). Watch more funny movies. Don't take yourself too seriously. Play outside more. Chase rainbows. Take your camera everywhere. Remember that God loves you. Love yourself as much as you love everyone else. Remember you're a princess.



I would tell the 10-year-old me:

Not to worry about the sleepless nights, not going to Prom, being called a bookworm. Ignore the accusations about being either bulimic or anorexic (some girls really are just skinny, and sweetheart, you were one of them). Draw and paint to your heart's content. Don't worry so much about what other people think. Realize that you are beautiful and perfect. Keep believing in fairies and fairy tales. Love unconditionally, but chose your friends carefully. Remember that life is beautiful.

But most of all, I'd tell her to remember to close her eyes and breathe deep often.


'Cause baby, it's gonna be great.



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