Friday, November 06, 2009
babysitting
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Chantile
at
11/06/2009
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Thursday, November 05, 2009
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
A fear of rectangles
This is particularly funny to me because I had a dream about it the other night... I won't give you all the details, because it's far too ridiculous (mr. hercules about drove off the road laughing so hard)
Posted by
Chantile
at
11/04/2009
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Labels: west wing
Monday, November 02, 2009
Halloween
We had a very fun party at our apartment on Saturday! Hope your weekend was a safe one!
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Chantile
at
11/02/2009
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Labels: Halloween
Thursday, October 22, 2009
validation
Posted by
Chantile
at
10/22/2009
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Labels: validation
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Why I love being me
The other day I read an article on Yahoo's blog about a Ralph Lauren model and was absolutely disgusted at the ad (and not just because I thought the clothes were bad). Read it if you haven't already. (Uncanny Valley, anyone?)
A couple of nights ago after I finished reading in the tub, I felt weird. Not because I like to almost boil myself in the water, but because I saw myself in the mirror. Now I know you're saying to yourself, "Self, why would that make Chantile feel weird?" and most days I would agree with you. But I've gained around twenty pounds since I met Mr. Hercules last year, and lately it's like seeing myself for the first time. The weight gain isn't something I'm complaining about--it's honestly about the grandest thing that could happen to my body, if you've known me very long--in fact, it's a little exciting. Mr. Hercules described how I looked when he met me as "Zombie-scary-skinny."
And now he pokes my stomach and pinches my fluff, and smiles. "I love you with weight on you. You're curvy, and you look healthy now," he said. (Which is true--I am actually MUCH more healthy now, and I always dreamt that in an alternate universe, I am a lovely voluptuous Latin woman who doesn't fall down in high heels).
We've been looking at pictures of ourselves (remember the long babbling post about cleaning up the computer?), and it's been interesting to see the transformation of me gaining weight. (I actually took pictures of myself to help me keep track of my weight--mile-markers of sorts. I thought about posting some of them, but they're gross.) I feel so much more like me now (even though I still sort of have hips of death), and it's a great feeling! I want to go to my doctor who told me last year to quit trying so hard to gain weight, because this is who I am and how I would probably always be, and show him how happy I am now, how much better I feel, how much better I sleep, how much better I look! Take that, high school guidance counselor, and everyone in my old singles wards who thought I had an eating disorder!
I had a friend call me the other day almost in tears because of a comment someone made about her weight. She's a lot like me: tall, skinny, and eats like a linebacker. Somehow, she's managed to avoid comments about her weight from everyone but her family. Until the other day. Why, oh why, do we women feel the need to be hurtful? We are born with such a capacity to love and make things beautiful; can't we extend that to each other? The only thing I could give my friend was a quote I read a long time ago: "Where is it written that the skin on thin women is thicker?"
It's not flattering--it's honestly disgusting. I don't know why anyone thought that it would be a good idea to change the model's body this way... I hereby declare that I will never shop Ralph Lauren ever again. Thanks, RL.
So instead of feeling the need to edit and change and falsify ourselves, I thought it would be nice to announce what we love about ourselves--our quirks, our freckles, our boney elbows, our double chins: it's all beautiful because it's us.
2 I am very empathic
3 I have a freakishly accurate memory for numbers
4 Watch out for my fast right hook! ;)
5 Hips of death!
6 I look great in green (no, that was not a clever way of saying that I have a low carbon footprint)
7 I have a wide, toothy grin
8 I can beat anyone at Oblivion!!! (yes, that was an official challenge)
9 I have an insatiable hunger for books
10 Have you tried my brownies? C'mon.
What do you love about yourself? :)
Posted by
Chantile
at
10/21/2009
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Labels: self-love
Thursday, October 15, 2009
Hollow me out
Pain lives me, a wound speaks with my mouth.
And when you return? Only you know
How you hollow me out and dance in the hollow.
- Jalal-ud-Din Rumi
This week I've been cleaning up my computer and sorting through things, which honestly means I've been saying to myself, "Oh, I forgot I had that!"
Mr. Hercules and I are 2 different energy types. I am a Type 2* and he's a Type 1**, but acts like 3***a lot. We talk about this often, and have found it useful to be able understand why we are the way we are. On Friday night Ty was asking me if I knew where my sewing tape measure was. Of course, you'd think it would be in my sewing box, so I went to look there. Nope. So, next logical place would be my dresser drawer (don't ask why, it makes sense to me). Not there either. Mr. Hercules stood there somewhat bemused, and said, "Well, where do you think you would have put it?" Next was a drawer on my computer desk (Type 2's like our piles and places. Our organization may not make sense to anyone else, but it does to us!). Not there, either. Ty finally found it (can't really remember where, now...) and asked me why I don't put things back in the same place every time. I told him because 1-it is boring that way, and 2-I like to have mini-adventures in my life, and I think that when I put something down, if I can't find again, I'll find it when I need it most, and if I don't and stumble over it again somewhere down the road, it's exciting because it's something you had forgotten you even had. (This happens to me with clothes and shoes a lot. It's like shopping for free!)
Which is probably why he keeps asking me where I put things after I fold his laundry. It's all generally in the same place... but it's not nearly as exciting his way.
But back to the original purpose of this post--it all makes sense to me, can't you keep up?--cleaning up the computer. In the midst of all of that cleaning and "finding," I've been looking at our wedding pictures a lot. This week I've also been trying to refocus my gratitude, for many things in my life, but especially for Tyson.
Posted by
Chantile
at
10/15/2009
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Labels: energy profiling, Rumi
Friday, October 09, 2009
happyness + 5 senses friday
Tasting: sweet, cold, delicious water
Touching: my new shirt from badbabytees but her shop is closed now :(
Smelling: angel heart body elixir from crystalwood
Feeling: sorry for mr. hercules, who is home sick with hurt ribs (we spent yesterday in the ER. good times)
Seeing: only sad, blue skies. No clouds :( bah
Posted by
Chantile
at
10/09/2009
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Labels: happyness
Thursday, October 08, 2009
Catching Up
The last couple of weeks have been so hectic. This last weekend was the first one I didn't spend out of town in the last month, and since Mr. Hercules and I spent Wednesday to Friday home sick, it was nice to have a break and not go anywhere.
Saturday was lovely. We "slept in" to about 8:45 after being awake until 3 a.m. early Saturday morning (an event deserving it's own post, I assure you--let's just say a certain blogger was irritated at her loud neighbors @ 1:14 in the morning, and finally called police. Who didn't leave the neighbor's apartment until 3 a.m. Yep. It was a great night!). My brother came and shared breakfast with us, and while I stood over the stove making eggs, cinnamon french toast, and bacon, rain began to pour beautifully outside--in the same instant that "Keep Us" (if you've read long, you know how much that song means to me) by Peter Bradley Adams came on.
It was the perfect morning.
A line from "Vapour Trail" by Trespassors William (originally performed by Ride) stayed in my head all day:
We never have enough, time to show our love
Posted by
Chantile
at
10/08/2009
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Labels: vapour trail
Monday, October 05, 2009
Polaroid Monday
Posted by
Chantile
at
10/05/2009
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Labels: polaroid monday
Monday, September 28, 2009
Polaroid Monday
Posted by
Chantile
at
9/28/2009
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Labels: polaroid monday
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Rain *** 200th Post!***
I know I missed Polaroid Monday. I'll post one soon to make up for it. In the meantime, today it is GORGEOUS. Abso-freaking-lutely fall gorgeous :) I started a Beginning Spanish course last night, and when the class was wrapping up, it just started dumping rain; it was thundering like crazy, and lightning was crashing everywhere. It. Was. Fantastic. :) Everyone was screaming (please, people...), running to their cars... I walked quietly and slowly, water sloshing in my shoes when I was barely 10 feet out the door (there may have been a puddle jump or two...). I drove home calmly and happily (even though you couldn't see the road. I'd say it was pretty close to flash-flooding), and by the time I got in the house, my pants, hoodie, and hat were completely soaked. I kissed Mr. Hercules hello, left my clothes in a nice big pile by the front door and jumped in a lovely hot shower. It was a perfect night :)
It continued to rain throughout the night, and has still been rainy today, but not as much. But I love the dreary grey--I feel right at home in it. (Have you caught on that I am not a fan of sunny days yet? Bah) Everything, even at work today, screams fall. So I offer you my 5 senses of this beautiful fall day:
Sight: my desktop wallpaper (can't remember where I got it to give credit, sorry!)
Touch: I can still feel Ty's scruffy kiss from this morning. (He rarely shaves during the week, which I adore. I like him scruffy. I hope to see a nice thick beard come winter!) Every morning, he leaves for work about an hour before me, and wakes me up by kissing me good morning/goodbye. It's one of my favorite moments of the day.
Sound: "Kingdom of Heaven" soundtrack; "Easy Money" by Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds; "Candleburn" by Dishwalla; "Lament" by Light of Aidan; also listening to Peter Bradley Adams. You know how much I love him. And, of course, "Rain" by Patty Griffin, and "Rain" by Priscilla Ahn. How could I leave them out? (Rain, rain don't go away--the sun can come back another day)
Smell: a vanilla chai candle, and this divine skin oil from Haunt. It's absolutely delicious. You have no idea. This is the epitome of fall for me. It smells like blood oranges, cardamom, and orchids. I use it as a body oil, but also put it in my hair.
Taste: Fresh peaches with a little sugar from my co-worker's trees.
It's a beautiful day.
On a side note: I can't believe I've actually written 200 posts... insane! I'm feeling quite proud of myself, actually. Today is a good day to celebrate, and I'm feeling excited about following through with something I told myself I would do better at (I don't scrapbook, I'm not good at keeping a journal any more, so this seemed like the logical thing to do to keep better track of the wonderful things in my life). So to celebrate, if you leave a comment on this post, you will get something. A mix CD? A piece of jewelry made by moi? Something lovely from Etsy? Who knows! I haven't decided yet. :) But I will reward your readership with... something. :)
Posted by
Chantile
at
9/15/2009
7
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Labels: 200th post, fall, rain
Saturday, September 12, 2009
A good day
I broke a tooth (which got fixed the same day, luckily!). Ty's been out of town since Thursday at a paintball tournament (I'm never in a great mood when he's gone). And I've been incredibly moody and irritated at stupid people who encroach their ignorance on other people. Etc.
But today, I finally got to meet my newest niece, Reagan. It was SUCH a great day! :) I hadn't seen my sister and bro-in-law in forever, and really missed them. It was fantastic. I'm in a good mood again :)
(especially after I got home and realized the reason people were looking at me funny when I stopped at a gas station to fill up was because I had torn a huge hole of death in my favorite pants and hadn't realized my bottom was hanging out. I am a graceful one. lol)
Posted by
Chantile
at
9/12/2009
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Labels: Reagan
Wednesday, September 09, 2009
We Are ODST
Posted by
Chantile
at
9/09/2009
1 comments
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Labels: halo 3






