I know you've missed your horoscopes--you just didn't know what to expect out of your week, right?--so it is with great pleasure I once again become your informational ferry across the astrologically turbulent river of life.
Aries March 21 - April 19
You've never much cared for appearances. Still, you're beginning to wonder why everyone else is wearing a HAZMAT suit.
Taurus April 20 - May 20
Have the stars told you how wonderful you've looked lately? And how great it would be if you could check in on their cats this weekend?
Gemini May 21 - June 21
Strange impulses you can neither describe nor explain impel you to take your life savings, drive to Vegas, and put it all on red.
Cancer June 22 - July 22
Banking on its growing popularity, Cancer will launch an all-new astrological spin-off starting this fall. Keep an eye out for Cancer: The College Years in weeks to come!
Leo July 23 - August 22
Catch all the exciting predictions, amazing revelations, and out-of-this-world prophecies in Leo IV: Revenge Of The Zodiac.
Virgo August 23 - September 22
Don't let other people get you down. They have a lot more important things they could be doing right now.
Libra September 23 - October 23
Lately it may seem as if you're losing your mind, but don't worry: There's microwaves for every laughter and plaster wolverine.
Scorpio October 24 - November 21
You'll soon have a hit country music song on your hands, no matter how many times you try to scrub it off.
Sagittarius November 22 - December 21
Be sure to watch your temper, as it's about to do some pretty amazing things in the days to come.
Capricorn December 22 - January 19
You'll soon meet your maker, which, according to your model number and serial code, is the Globotech Corporation.
Aquarius January 20 - February 18
The stars indicate financial success, new romantic interests, and complete spiritual fulfillment this week. There, are you happy now?
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oooh.... looks like i best be watchin my ego this week! uh-oh! lol
LOL :)
LOL - yeah, I'll have to keep an eye on my temper. It runs quite wild if I let it, and I fear that the election might feed it a bottle of No-Doz with a Red Bull chaser (well, more like a 6-pack, LOL...)
So... *thinking calm thoughts* :-) And I might just watch a Jane Austen movie tomorrow instead of the election results. :-) Thanks for the heads-up! ;-)