Rare Books & Fishing Tackle: 10.2008

Oddly Enough...

Fun things on Reuters:

From London comes a story about this senior government official who was punished for leaving secret intelligence files on a train when he was taking them home. How do you suppose that went?

“Is this Lost and Found? I left some files on the 6:40 from Paddington yesterday and I wondered if anybody turned them in? They were in a tan folder, and the cover said, Top-Secret Plans for Invading Pakistan and Toppling the Corrupt Regime.”

“I’m afraid not, sir. Here’s one called Top-Secret Plans for the Normandy Invasion, and another titled Using Opium to Take Over China and Get Rich, but those have been here for some time.”

“I say! May I leave some identification in case they turn up?”

“Of course. Hmm, License to Kill. Jolly good! We don’t get many of those around here, Mr. Seven…”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

sted by: Robert Basler

Hey, Blog Guy, you give the very best career advice. I especially value your tips on how to know if we’ve made a bad career choice.

Thank you. Here’s something that always works. I call it the triple reality check:

If you’re at work right now, first look down. Do you see the ground hundreds of feet below you? Then look at your hands. Are you clinging for dear life to a swaying fishnet? Next, look up. Is there a hovering chopper?

If you answered yes to these questions, I recommend you get your guidance counselor’s home address and give it to the Jehovah’s Witnesses.

Haunted by waters

I've struggled to have a good attitude today, I think because I'm so tired and although I've been sleeping, I seem to be more tired when I wake up than when I went to sleep. It's times like these I'd rather be Alexander Supertramp, and just walk off into the woods for awhile.

Of course, I don't run away into the wild like I would like to; instead I sit at my desk, pretending to fly fish. I've never known such calm as when I'm fishing, and it's something I haven't been able to do as much the past couple of years.

"Eventually, all things merge into one, and a river runs through it. The river was cut by the world's great flood and runs over rocks from the basement of time. On some of the rocks are timeless raindrops. Under the rocks are the words, and some of the words are theirs. I am haunted by waters." -Norman Fitzroy Maclean, A River Runs Through It

I tried to take a nap at lunch today, but still couldn't sleep. Still, it was nice to lay there in the stillness, whispering my mantra to myself--"All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well"--and know that it will be.

Even if I don't get to go fishing.

"There is pleasure in the pathless woods,
There is rapture on the lonely shore,
There is society where none intrudes,
By the deep sea and the music in its roar;
I love not man the less, but Nature more."
— Lord Byron

Fun weekend

This weekend was so much fun! While the men-folk were outside working...

(look at the bulging muscles on my man!)

...inside the house, Libby and I were a bit more laid back....

(I think I make a good looking She-Man, don't you?)

We just couldn't understand when Joe & Ty cringed when we wanted to kiss them! But, given that Joe is an Ipson, he soon joined in the fun.

But, I've got to say that this is my most favorite picture:

Your Birthday Today

Throwing a temper tantrum won't do you any good today. If you really want to go to the zoo that bad, just drive yourself.

Quizzie

Libby tagged me, so here goes!

Your first name:

Your middle name:

Your last name:

Your birth place:

Your best friend:

A place you would like to visit:

Your favorite place that you have visited:

Where you live:

Your past love:

Your favorite flower:

Your favorite object:

Your favorite food:

Your favorite color:

Your favorite animal:

What you are doing right now:

True Age = 40 (stolen from Jessie...)

[x] I know how to make a pot of coffee.
[x] I keep track of dates using a calendar.
[x] I own more than one credit card.
[x] I know how to change the oil in a car.
[x] I do my own laundry.
[x] I vote every election.
[x] I can cook for myself.
[x] I think politics are exciting.
[x] I balance my checkbook.
[x] My parents have intelligent things to say.

total: 10

[x] I show up for school/college/work every day.
[x] I always carry a pen in my pocket/purse.
[x] I've never gotten a detention.
[x] I have never smoked a cigarette.
[x] I have never gotten completely trashed.
[ ] I have forgotten my own birthday at least once.
[x] I like to take walks by myself.
[x] I've watched talk shows.
[x] I know what 'credibility' means without looking it up.
[ ] I drink coffee at least once a week.

total: 8

[x] I know how to do the dishes.
[x] I can count to 10 in another language.
[x] When I say I'm going to do something I do it.
[x] My parents trust me.
[x] I can mow the lawn.
[x] I can make adults laugh without being stupid.
[x] I remember to water the plants.
[x] I study when I have to.
[x] I pay attention at school/college.
[x] I remember to feed my pets.

total:10

[x] I can spell 'experience' without looking it up
[ ] I work out on a regular basis.
[x] I clean up my own mess.
[x] The people at Starbucks know me by name. (Does the Chinese restaurant count? I think so!)

total: 3

[ ] My favorite kind of food is take out.
[ ] I have gained weight since high school.
[ ] The first thing I do when I wake up is get caffeine.
[x] I can't go to the store without getting something I don't need.
[x] I understand political jokes the first time they are said.
[x] I can type quickly.

Total: 3

[x] I have realized that the weather forecast changes every hour.
[ ] My only friends are from my place of employment.
[ ] I have been to a tupperware party.
[x] I have realized that no one will take you seriously unless you are over the age of 25 and have a job.
[ ] I have more bills than I can pay.
[x] Some of my friends are older than I am.
[x] I can say no to staying out all night.
[x] I use the internet every day.
[ ] My wardrobe hasn't changed in a while.
[x] I can read a book and actually finish it.

Total: 6

Total:40
Add up all the numbers and re-post this as: "My true age is..."

"The Promised Land always lies on the other side of the wilderness." -Havelock Ellis

If you know me, you can acknowledge my obsession with books. But if you really know me, you know how much I love Sarah Ban Breathnach, truly one of my most favorite authors. I've started reading her books again, because they give me such a lift and remind me to have a more grateful heart.

Ty hasn't been feeling well, so he fell asleep early. Back home at my apartment now, I'm listening to Van Morrison's "Into the Mystic" and perusing some of my favorite books, Sarah's included, and wanted to share some of my favorite thoughts (and probably songs as the playlist moves on).

"Wilderness--a bleak, numbing word that instantly calls to mind a feeling of hopelessness, nothingness, barrenness, and most of all, a sense of powerlessness. There's a reason that the biblical expression "the voice of one crying in the wilderness' has come to mean abject abandonment. You can wail and gnash your teeth all you want, but in the Wilderness no one hears your heart tearing asunder except God, who presumably sent you there. Ironically, according to ancient legend, the world Wilderness didn't conjure up a place of punishment, but rather a place of learning, spiritual growth, understanding, healing, and accomplishment. It referred to a wellspring of Divine energy in the guise of despair, hardship, and pain; your experience in the Wildernes was designed to prepare or propel you toward your destiny. Or pry you loose from whatever was keeping you from it." - Sarah Ban Breathnach, Something More pg. 176

There's no such thing as chance
And what to us seems merest accident
Springs from the deepest source of destiny
--Schiller

"Here's what I caught myself thinking about in meditation this morning.

"I was wondering where I should live once this year of traveling has ended. I don't want to move back to New York just out of reflex. Maybe a new town, instead. Austin is supposed to be nice. And Chicago has all that beautiful architecture. Horrible winters, thought. Or maybe I'll live abroad. I've heard good things about Sydney...If I lived somewhere cheaper than New York, maybe I could afford an extra bedroom and then I could have a special meditation room! That'd be nice. I could paint it gold. Or maybe a rich blue. No, gold. No, blue...

"Finally, noticing this train of thought, I was aghast. I thought: Here you are in India, in an Ashram in one of the holiest pilgramage sites on earth. And instead of communing with the divine, you're trying to plan where you'll be meditating a year from now in a home that doesn't yet exist in a city yet to be determined. How about this, you spastic fool--how about you try to meditate right here, right where you actually are?

"I pulled my attention back to the silent repetition of the mantra.

"A few moments later, I paused to take back that mean comment about calling myself a spastic fool. I decided maybe that wasn't very loving.

"Still, I thought in the next moment, a gold meditation room would be nice."

- Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love pg 171-172

“Expect to have hope rekindled. Expect your prayers to be answered in wondrous ways. The dry seasons in life do not last. The spring rains will come again.” - Sarah Ban Breathnach

"Every time we remember to say 'thank you,' we experience nothing less than heaven on earth." - Sarah Ban Breathnach

"Never forget that once upon a time, in an unguarded moment, you recognized yourself as a friend."

— Elizabeth Gilbert

"Look for God. Look for God like a man with his head on fire looks for water." - Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray Love

"There is so much about my fate that I cannot control, but other things do fall under the jurisdiction. I can decide how I spend my time, whom I interact with, whom I share my body and life and money and energy with. I can select what I can read and eat and study. I can choose how I'm going to regard unfortunate circumstances in my life-whether I will see them as curses or opportunities. I can choose my words and the tone of voice in which I speak to others. And most of all, I can choose my thoughts." - Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

"Faith is walking face-first and full-speed into the dark. If we truly knew all the answers in advance as to the meaning of life and the nature of God and the destiny of our souls, our belief would not be a leap of faith and it would not be a courageous act of humanity; it would just be... a prudent insurance policy." - Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

"Life's metaphors are God's instructions." - Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

"I thought about one of my favorite Sufi poems, which says that God long ago drew a circle in the sand exactly around the spot where you are standing right now. I was never not coming here. This was never not going to happen." - Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

"...God never slams a door in your face without opening a box of Girl Scout cookies..." - Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love

Just for fun:

"As David once put it, 'You have the opposite of a poker face. You have, like . . . miniature golf face.'"

- Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love pg 41

And a good song to end with: "Boulders" by New Found Glory ("Coming Home" album)

Come what may and love it

"In 1939, during the Mrs. Miniver years, when the English government feared a German invasion, the Ministry of Information had a simple poster prepared that was meant to be distributed should the worst happen. It read simply: Keep Calm and Carry On. Despite living through air raids, the bombing of Britain, the loss a generation of their men to the battlefield, severe rationing from eggs to thread and having to draw a long black line up the back of their legs because of a shortage of stockings, the “worst” actually never happened. A few years ago one of these posters was found in a box of old books. Now nearly 70 years later, may its wisdom warm your heart as it does mine and bring a smile today. Keep calm and carry on. No matter what may happen in the course of a day, remember it’s nothing that you and God can’t handle together. So repeat after me: Keep calm and carry on and keep your Gratitude Journal handy. Join us as we have fun remaking our world, one happy, positive blessing and joyful simplicity at a time. We’re celebrating a new prosperity—one of living and not lack." --Sarah Ban Breathnach

Things I am grateful for today:
*the love of a good man
*chocolate
*clouds that are promising rain
*a warm bed to sleep in
*my job
*a wonderful, loving family
*text messaging
*hot baths
*good music
*long-sleeved shirts
*etsy
*Midol!!
*books

Chuck Norris facts

A Chuck Norris-delivered Roundhouse Kick is the preferred method of execution in 16 states.

When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris’ house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.

Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.

Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.

Chuck Norris invented his own type of karate. It's called Chuck-Will-Kill.

When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.
Chuck Norris once sued the Houghton-Mifflin textbook company when it became apparent that their account of the war of 1812 was plagiarized from his autobiography.

Contrary to popular belief, there is indeed enough Chuck Norris to go around.
Chuck Norris doesn’t shave; he kicks himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Chuck Norris is Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen San Diego.

When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer. You will score over 8000.

Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

When you're Chuck Norris, anything + anything is equal to 1. One roundhouse kick to the face.

Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.

In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job". That is the story of the universe.

Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.

Archeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236. It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"

Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar. The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.

Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.

The show Survivor had the original premise of putting people on an island with Chuck Norris. There were no survivors, and nobody is brave enough to go to the island to retrieve the footage.

It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life? In actuality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris will find you and kill you.

Chuck Norris has a deep and abiding respect for human life... unless it gets in his way.

There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Chuck Norris lives in Oklahoma.

The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked one of the corners off.

When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people. He walks through them.

James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator. However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
It takes 14 puppeteers to make Chuck Norris smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down

Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer. Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.

Scotty in Star Trek often says “Ye cannae change the laws of physics.” This is untrue. Chuck Norris can change the laws of physics. With his fists.

Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bed frames, and sidewalks.
Using his trademark roundhouse kick, Chuck Norris once made a field goal in RJ Stadium in Tampa Bay from the 50 yard line of Qualcomm stadium in San Diego.

Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.

Chuck Norris does not own a stove, oven, or microwave , because revenge is a dish best served cold.

Tom Clancy has to pay royalties to Chuck Norris because "The Sum of All Fears" is the name of Chuck Norris' autobiography.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris is expected to win gold in every swimming competition at the 2008 Beijing Olympics, even though Chuck Norris does not swim. This is because when Chuck Norris enters the water, the water gets out of his way and Chuck Norris simply walks across the pool floor.
The crossing lights in Chuck Norris's home town say "Die slowly" and "die quickly". They each have a picture of Chuck Norris punching or kicking a pedestrian.

Chuck Norris doesn't step on toes. Chuck Norris steps on necks.

The movie "Delta Force" was extremely hard to make because Chuck had to downplay his abilities. The first few cuts were completely unbelievable.

Chuck Norris proved that we are alone in the universe. We weren't before his first space expedition.

Superman once watched an episode of Walker, Texas Ranger. He then cried himself to sleep.

Chuck Norris does not "style" his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.

There is no such thing as global warming. Chuck Norris was cold, so he turned the sun up.
Anytime someone is elected president in the United States, they must ask permission from Chuck Norris to live in the White House. The reason for this is because Chuck Norris had won every Federal, State, and Local election since 1777. He just allows others to run the country in his place.

The last thing you hear before Chuck Norris gives you a roundhouse kick? No one knows because dead men tell no tales.

Chuck Norris is the only person in the world that can actually email a roundhouse kick.

Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.

Chuck Norris once pulled out a single hair from his beard and skewered three men through the heart with it.
When J. Robert Oppenheimer said "I am become death, the destroyer Of worlds", He was not referring to the atomic bomb. He was referring to the Chuck Norris Halloween costume he was wearing.

And this one’s for you, Ty:

Ninjas want to grow up to be just like Chuck Norris. But usually they grow up just to be killed by Chuck Norris.

Fall; or, "How I Spent My Conference Call Time"

I am so excited about fall. I love jacket weather, having an excuse for big warm socks, skirts and tights, hot chocolate, and crisp mornings. I love watching the leaves change color, and for the first time in years I have someone to share it with, which makes me so content and happy. :) It also makes me want to bake all the time, even if I don't feel like eating it.

I'm ready for rainy days, curled up with a good book and a blanket, with "A Light On A Hill" by Margot and the Nuclear So-and-Sos stuck in my head.

My daily doodle (with "A Light On a Hill" stuck in my head while on a conference call)--I seem to reallly like trees...

10 minutes and I can go home to Ty, who's making me pancakes for dinner. :) I love my man!

Book of the Day: A New Earth by Eckhart Toole
Song playing right now: "A Light On a Hill" by Margot and the Nuclear So-and-Sos (It really was my random song!)

If you knew what was coming, you wouldn't be wasting valuable time reading your horoscope.

Aries March 21 - April 19

Northerly winds will whisper the name of a former love in your ear, ruthlessly mocking you for having had a relationship with someone called "Ooooouuuuussssshhhhhh."

Taurus April 20 - May 20

You'll be swarmed by a rare strain of Americanized killer bees who, unlike their Africanized cousins, just want to hang out and watch TV all day.

Gemini May 21 - June 21

The coming week will be influenced by forces outside your control, namely gravity, linear momentum, and high velocity friction.

Cancer June 22 - July 22

Buy yourself some extremely long bed sheets. You'll be making an escape rope out of them very soon.

Leo July 23 - August 22

Your interest in temporal paradoxes ends almost before it begins this week, which considering the subject matter, is strangely fitting.

Virgo August 23 - September 22

You're not the kind of person who constantly goes around saying the sky is falling, making you ill-equipped to cope with the events of this Thursday.

Libra September 23 - October 23

The old adage "The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence" will feel particularly appropriate this week when you grow increasingly envious of how much grayer your neighbor's cement driveway looks than yours.

Scorpio October 24 - November 21

Your future as a songwriter ends almost before it begins when you find that someone has already compared the depth, power, and beauty of their love to an ocean.

Capricorn December 22 - January 19

You've made it your life's mission to find the best crab cakes in Boston. Truly, you're one of America's unsung heroes.

Aquarius January 20 - February 18

If you've ever regretted not pursuing a career in bullfighting, this week may bring an accidental chance to start over.

Pisces February 19 - March 20

Despite the promise of a new car, an all-expense-paid trip to Greece, and a four-piece living room set, you'll once again go for the box with the question mark on it.

Doodling

Work in progress... It's nice to be drawing again. I can only scan in black & white, so you can't see the colors, but it's still a tiny bit cool this way.

The luckiest

I have a good man. Scratch that--I have the BEST man :) This last week I've had a killer migraine, and last night had a big problem again with my heart--nothing new for me, but it was the first time he saw me in that much pain--and Tyson's been there for me every moment he could. I've never had a guy take such good care of me! (And leave me cute sticky notes on my desk :) lol)

He is so kind, and there isn't a day that we've been together that he hasn't made me laugh. I am the luckiest girl alive :)

Sagittarius Avoiding personal questions may be one thing, but throwing down a series of smoke bombs and escaping in the ensuing chaos is just plain rude.

Welcome

Oddly Enough...

Haunted by waters