When you are trying to avoid stapling random people out of frustration, this is a better outlet. Not a great representation, but I only had 6 minutes. I'll do better next time.

Ann's Baby #4:

I feel very irritated today. I don't want to be at work. I woke up early this morning and enjoyed the stillness--until the cacophony of police sirens and ambulance wails disenchanted that reverie. I should have known it would set the tone of the rest of the day.

I came to work, expecting a good day--it's Friday, payroll day, so it's usually not too bad, just hectic--but to my surprise had a customer banging on the door at 8:01. And wanted somebody signed up. Now. I didn't find myself feeling nice or cheerful, but did my job and got the champion worker they found ready to go. For the first half of the time the employee was here, so was his boss--looming in the corner, staring. Apparently he wasn't aware that I was the Evil Eye staredown champion of 2004. He left after a half hour, and sat in his truck. His diesel truck. With the motor running. It had been running since he got there, before 8:00. He sat out there, letting it run, for a total of an hour and a half. I wanted to smack him with my desk organizer.

Now my co-worker has left to go to the doctor (please let him release her to a full day's work!!!), and my other co-worker is not helping me with payroll, because she is doing an assignment. Convenient. She really is working, but it just leaves everything else for me to do. It gets tiring.

At least it's Friday, right?

Being the office's Project Person gets really old. I wish I could be irresponsible. I think it'd be fun.

EDIT: Maybe I'm just hungry lol

You know you wanted more... ;)

Taurus April 20 - May 20

Mars in your sun sign indicates that you will go to work, watch televised sports, and enjoy several meals this week.

Capricorn December 22 - January 19

You never liked bears, never had any curiosity about bears, and hardly ever think about them, so it's no surprise that there aren't any around when you could really use one.

Aries March 21 - April 19

Years after losing friends and family members to the obsession, you will finally admit that your life-long goal of becoming the Pythagoras of isosceles triangles is not worth the trouble.

I seem to leave out Ann & Kannie a lot, so just for you guys:

Libra September 23 - October 23

You weren't a member, and you never watched them perform, but still, you have no idea what you'll do with yourself now that the Romanian women's gymnastics team has disbanded.

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21

You knew that hanging out with that fire-eating strongman and sword-swallower would get you in trouble, but you thought it would be related to fire-eating or sword-swallowing, not check-kiting.

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21

You'll find it hard to live a normal life for the next couple months, during which it will suddenly and inexplicably become fashionable to jump motorcycles over you.

Libra September 23 - October 23

You can never remember if, when meeting new business associates, you're supposed to give your name and shake hands firmly while looking them in the eye, or break their collarbones with the edge of your hand and run away to study woodworking in New Hampshire under an assumed name.

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21

You'll be wandering the streets, lost in thought, pondering the missing factors in your million-dollar plan, when suddenly it will hit you: the cross-town A63 express bus.

Anyone else I left out?

I've decided that I haven't had a good attitude about work the past few months, and it's time to change that, because I know things will look up and be better if I think positively. So I am trying to be more friendly and helpful, and not feel irritated at all the stupid people I meet (lol) :) But by this time in the afternoon, I'm tired, I want to go home & see Ty, and I am done dealing with people. So I've been looking for funny things to make me laugh, and thought I'd share a few:

My horoscope:

Gemini May 21 - June 21

You will realize who your real friends are this week when a local doctor finally prescribes you some much-needed antipsychotics.

I also really liked these lol:

Capricorn December 22 - January 19

According to the stars, nothing will be able to stop you this week, which sounds great until you realize that you'll spend most of it behind the wheel of a runaway gasoline truck.

Pisces February 19 - March 20

The technical details are still being worked out, but executives promise that your first few hilarious and heartwarming years will soon be released as a deluxe DVD package.

Leo July 23 - August 22

The important thing is that you tried. Not that you failed. Which you did. Though that's not important. No, the fact that you failed is not important at all.

Scorpio October 24 - November 21

You've always had a funny way of showing affection, which is unfortunate, as your wife's getting pretty tired of all the pies in the face.

Taurus April 20 - May 20

Will you finally get that big job promotion? Is whirlwind romance in the cards for you? Tune in to Taurus next week for all the answers and more!

Virgo August 23 - September 22

You always knew the day would come when the machines would rise up and take over the world, but never did you imagine it'd be so convenient.

Scorpio October 24 - November 21 (I know, it's a Scorpio repeat, but it was funny lol)

More and more, you're beginning to suspect you're just around to help move the plot forward.

Pisces February 19 - March 20 (Another Pisces repeat...)

The stars indicate that—hoo, boy—that's definitely going to hurt.

Gemini May 21 - June 21 (And another Gemini... this one is funny because I have a friend named Nathan lol)

Your friend Nathan will continue to display talents and skills that make you seem boring by comparison.

Stolen from Kannie :)

3 Joys:

1. Ty
   
2. Warm socks
   
3. Good music
   

3 Fears:

1. Pigs (Except for Spider-Pig)
   
2. not being needed
   
3. spiders
   

3 Obsessions:

1. Music
   
2. Office supplies
   
3. chocolate
   

3 Surprising facts:

1. I'm terrified of drowning, but I love water
   
2. I can be won over with chocolate pudding or tacos
   
3. I can predict the weather with surprising accuracy
   

8 Things I'm passionate about:

1. human rights
   
2. Tyson :)
   
3. reading
   
4. shoes
   
5. cooking
   
6. politics
   
7. good conversation
   
8. naps
   

8 words or phrases I say often:

1. Indeed
2. "Due to your criminal history, we are not able to hire you at this time..."
   
3. Dude!
   
4. "I know, right?"
   
5. Sweet!
   
6. Bleh!
   
7. Rock On!
   
8. Seriously...
   

8 Things I want to do before I die:

1. Go to Italy
   
2. Ride in a hot air balloon
   
3. Visit Yellowstone
   
4. bake a successful quiche
   
5. become proficient at knitting/crocheting
   
6. get married
   
7. be a mom
   
8. see the ocean
   

8 Things I pray for:

1. patience
   
2. hope
   
3. endurance
   
4. understanding
   
5. people I love and care about
   
6. peace
   
7. a kind heart
   
8. compassion towards others
   

8 Things I've learned:

1. People are particularly stupid today and I can't talk to anymore of them.
2. 85% of people really are good natured
   
3. "All shall be well"
   
4. "Groan and forget it"
   
5. A smile can smooth over a tense situation more than a frown
   
6. I love myself
7. Things really aren't as bad as they seem
8. God doesn't bring you somewhere and then dump you (Thanks Ann!)
   

I was able to meet with author Mark Spragg for lunch today with a few of my friends. I went to the book reading/signing last night, which was awesome (I bought 2 books), and today at lunch was able to ask him questions about writing. My biggest problem is allowing myself to relax, write, and not be such a perfectionist. I feel like the people who know me, who know how I write, have such an expectation for how I should be writing, and what they should get, that I stare at the computer screen blankly, suffocating within myself until one good sentence comes out.

So to be able to have someone who's published look at me across the table and tell me that 95% of what we all write is crap anyway (LOL) and that you're looking for that 5% that means something, but you have to write the 95% to get the 5%. But the best advice he gave me was, "Chantile, you're going to have to learn that you are just like every other person. You're concerned that you're being too personal in your writing, but let your ego go. You can still be honest and connect with your audience, because they have had the same thoughts, felt the same emotions. There's nothing you've thought or dreamt that is original. But you can write it in a new way, and in a tangible, tactile way that will make people connect with what you're trying to say." (At least that was the gist of it :) lol)

I wish I could say that I feel inspired to write, and that my writer's block is gone; it's not. But I do feel less scared, and I'm ready to try again.

Biggest compliment of the day--my old English professor (we lovingly call her Professor X), came to lunch with us, and told Mark that my book is "captivating." :)

Actually, saying that Ty is amazing is an understatement--he's actually more of a universal phenomenon. He's always so sweet; today he popped in during my lunch break and brought me a gift (SO cute! I'll have to show a picture of one of my presents :) lol). He makes me feel so special.

Last night we took pictures; I totally pirated this off of his Myspace page (although he would call it ninja-ing--sorry babe, but pirates are better!).

Aren't we just adorable?

1. What do you carry with you at all times?
A knife, my phone, and some cash. And my fabulously sharp wit.

2. Goal you would like to achieve this year:
Pick up archery again

3. Have you thought about having children?
Yep

4. What’s the biggest argument you’ve ever gotten into recently?
A debate over income taxes. I won. :D

5. How many piercings do you have?
2

6. Do you prefer talking on the phone or online?
I’m funnier online, but if it’s a serious conversation, definitely on the phone, if not in person

7. Are you a morning person or a night person?
You don't want to see me in the morning... and I'm starting to sleep @ night, so I guess I'm more of a lunch person...

8. Do you remember your dreams?
Vividly.

9. What do you have to do before you sleep?
Curl my toes 12 times

10. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
My brother Joe

11. Who was the last person you talked to in person?
A person applying for a job

12. Is someone mad at you right now?
Probably… lol

13. Are you perfect?
Well that’s silly—of course I am!

14. Can you do a cartwheel?
Yep!

15. What was the last movie you saw in theaters?
"The Dark Knight"

16. Have you ever had a reptile as a pet?
No, but we had a lizard for a class pet in 7th grade Bio

17. What is your favorite fruit?
Any will do, but especially apples :)

18. Who was your last missed call on your cell phone?
Barbara

19. Where are you most ticklish?
EVERYWHERE!!

20. When was the last time you were sick?
Tuesday night (I think?) after Ty and I ate KFC... bleh!

21. How many siblings do you have?
6

22. Did you ever try running away from home when you were younger?
I wanted to join the circus!

23. Have you ever finished a rubik’s cube?
Can’t honestly remember! Don't think so, though...

24. What is one wish you have?
To stand at the top of a high mountain and feel the wind on my face and know I'm truly alive

25. Are you wearing socks right now?
Nope! My feet are going commando!

26. When was the last time you went out of state?
Oy… can’t remember. Probably a couple of months ago…

27. Last thing you ate:
Nothing healthy I'm sure... I think it was a Batman Fruit Roll-up

28. Do you think Barbie is a negative role model for young girls?
YES!

29. Do you like mornings?
I like 4 a.m. mornings, but after that, I’m more of an evening/twilight person.

30. Will you donate organs after you pass?
Of course! They can have any I don’t need now, if they want…

31. Have you been outside of the USA?
Does Canada count?

32. If you could pick the temperature of the outdoors for the rest of your life?
74°F--but I'm sure I'd still wear a sweater

33. What is one talent that no one knows about you?
Not sure if I can do it anymore, but I used to be able to wrap my legs around my arms and walk on my hands

34. Where do you work?
at my office :)

35. What are two inside jokes you have with someone?
(1) Bon Jovi is my father
(2) "Spider-Pig! Spider-Pig! Does whatever a Spider-Pig does! Can he swing from a web? No, he can't--he's a pig!..."

36. Favorite quote???
ATM, “Fate loves the fearless.” James Russell Lowell

37. What is your favorite song?!?
Too many to count, but one is “Existentialism On Prom Night” by Straylight Run. It always cheers me up—you can’t help but shout, “You would kill for this, just a little bit, just a little bit, you would, you would!!!”

38. Chocolate or Vanilla?
Definitely chocolate.

I'm back!

I know you've all missed me--thanks to work temporarily banning blogger (ugh... that sucked!), I haven't been able to update. The past week has been, literally, THE BEST WEEK OF MY LIFE. I'm dating the most AMAZING man--I can't even describe him to you other than to say that it's definitely worth going through all the torment of past relationships just to meet him. Every woman should be as lucky as me :)