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What kind of paradise am I looking for? I've got everything I want, but still I want more

This is an Ani Difranco, "Grey" kind of day. You know, "The sky is grey, the sand is grey, and the ocean is grey. I feel right at home in the stunning monochrome, alone in my way..."

I don't mind these kind of days, though. I enjoy the slower pace. It's finally begun to act like spring the last few days, and then waking up this morning, the clouds rolled over the mountains, obscuring any jagged edges and numbing up the valley a bit.

These kind of days make me want to stay in bed. Not for any new depression that comes with the rain and grey; I just enjoy the softness, the slowness. It makes me want to bake, read poetry and eat warm scones.
Even work is slow today. Our morning appointments cancelled, and my lunch date isn't until 1, so there's not much to do. I've got the big projects out of the way; now it's just auditing and paperwork (w00t). I'm even doing that slowly, because it's not going to take me much longer.

"Geometry is the knowledge of the eternally existent." -Plato

For anyone who missed the White House Correspondents' Association Dinner last night, let me tell you, it rocked. You can read about it here if you didn't get to watch it, but this was my favorite moment:

Gently mocking himself and his absent would-be successors, President George W. Bush bade farewell to his antagonists in the press with a comic routine that ended with him conducting a US Marine Corps band.

None of the three presidential candidates attended the White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, an annual gathering of the great and the good of the American media along with a smattering of Hollywood celebrities.

Mr Bush, who has the lowest approval rating of a president since polling began, joked about his sagging popularity, noting that even his daughter was deserting him. "I have to say I'm kind of surprised we don't have more presidential candidates here tonight. Like, any. Senator (John) McCain's not here, he probably wanted to distance himself from me a little bit. You know, he's not alone. Jenna's moving out too." He linked the absence of the Democrats to campaign controversies involving Hillary Clinton's fabrications about landing in Bosnia under sniper fire and Barack Obama's controversial pastor Jeremiah Wright.

"The two Democratic candidates aren't here either," he continued. "Senator (Hillary) Clinton couldn't get to the building because of sniper fire, and Senator (Barack) Obama's at church."
Mr Bush surveyed the dinner guests, who included stars such as Ben Affleck, Jennifer Garner, Colin Firth and Martha Stewart as well as politicians like Condoleeza Rice, Colin Powell and Madeleine Albright.

Seeing the "Baywatch" actress Pamela Anderson and Mitt Romney, a Mormon former presidential candidate, he noted: "Pamela Anderson and Mitt Romney in the same room. Isn't that one of the signs of the apocalypse?"


So I'm back to not sleeping, which isn't much of a problem, because I've decided to learn a couple of new languages. I am also crocheting (and will soon be sewing some as well) sleep eye masks, so if you'd like one, let me know. The one I'm working on now has owl eyes ;)

I've started this great book called A Beginner's Guide to Constructing the Universe: The Mathematical Archetypes of Nature, Art and Science by Michael S. Schneider. It's all about the math of nature, and I highly recommend it to anyone. Well, geeks and nerds like myself, of course, but it's not a difficult math book; it's really quite fascinating.

It's interesting to note that Scheider doesn't come across as a "math atheist," but appears to show rather that math proves there is a "higher intelligence," that nature is far too elegant to be random. John Mitchell states in the introduction that "We cannot help being attracted by the religious veiew, that the world is a harmonious divinely ordered creation in which, as Plato promised the uninitiated, 'things are taken care of far better than you could possibly believe.'"

Ode to Income Tax

So I got into an argument via text-message with an ex of mine today about the unconstitutionality of paying income taxes. If you want to get me going on a rant, bring up how you don't want to pay income taxes.

Needless to say, I won that argument. I brought up my little friend, the 16th Amendment, added a little history lesson, and that was that.

(Note to self: stop dating younger men. And Republicans)

Baracky and The Terminator

Today I am grateful for popcorn. I usually eat some every day at work for a snack, and I haven't been able to eat it at all for the past week (wisdom teeth). So it's been nice to chew some--of course, I look like I was born in a barn, smacking away with my mouth open (still can't feel my lips, so I have been biting them if I chew with my mouth closed lol), but oh, happy day!

So I'm driving out to Park City tonight for a girls' weekend. It was my best friend's birthday on Wednesday, but I had the county convention (*cough*I'mliberalbutliketovoteinprimariestherforeiamregisteredrepublican*cough*), and had to vote. So we're going to drive up to SLC, spend the night, and then shop Saturday before coming home. I don't care about the shopping (aside from hitting a great book store and then going to Wild Oats) ; I'm really just excited about getting out of town for the weekend. And, the convention was awesome. It was my first one, and I'm hoping the first of many :)

For anyone following the campaign (read: everyone with a pulse), I found this article by Euguene Robinson of the Washington Post absolutely hillarious. This is my favorite part:

"...Yes, I know it's inappropriate to compare a talented and accomplished woman such as Hillary Clinton with a homicidal cyborg from the future. But it's hard to come up with a better image for the woman's sheer relentlessness. If she ever says "I'll be back" while I'm within earshot, I'm getting out of Dodge..."

Current Book: The Magician's Nephew by C.S. Lewis
Current Music: "River" by Joni Mitchell

Schadenfreude = Dentists and the House of Representatives

It's been an eventful past week; I got my wisdom teeth out and spent time in the ER (not for the teeth). Let me tell you, that tooth-pulling was painful. Still is, matter of fact. I had 5 wisdom teeth, and one was impacted. I wonder what kind of person enjoys inflicting pain such as that throbbing in my jaw right now. But I do appreciate that I live in a country where we have skilled surgeons who have the training and ability to cause such pain, for the better good, of course.
I've slept perhaps 2 hours a night for the past week (did I mention I'm an insomniac? I actually joined an online support group, but no one was online when I was awake [you think I'm kidding, but I'm being completely serious]), and I've had a lot of time for brooding and thinking. Perhaps too much. But I think it's good to clean out the dust in your mind every now and again. It is spring cleaning time, after all.
So I'm making some big decisions, trying to aim for the things that I really truly want. It's going to take awhile to achieve some of my goals (buying a house, taking a trip to Italy, publishing my book), but there's a few simpler ones that I should be able to do as well (planting an herb garden, doing yoga everyday).
I had a guy tell me in church last week (after I made a very rude comment about him, of course. It was that or punch the jerk in the head...) that he doesn't believe that I am as prickly and mean as I come off, that deep down inside he thinks I'm a very nice person. I told him he didn't know me very well. Of course I felt bad about what I said to him, but not why I said it. I think I am a nice person--I try to be, most of the time. But when people are being hurt, made fun of, or made to feel uncomfortable, I do one thing I do very well--fight back. Most of the time I do this by making calls to my representatives, senators, president, etc... writing letters, enlisting others, writing to foreign leaders.... I feel very blessed and fortunate to have the life that I do, and it physically hurts me to see someone being defeated when I can do something to stop it. Blame it on my older sister--she always stuck up for me. Not everyone has someone who will do that for them, so I guess I've taken it on myself to be that person for others. I do get teased for it a lot, but secretly I'm smiling about it, because that's what I'm known for out here.
I've had this poem by Langston Hughes stuck in my head all day. Actually, there's a few of them floating around in there, but I'll lead with this one:

Gather up,
In the arms of your pity
The sick, the depraved,
The desperate, the tired
all the scum of our weary city
Gather up
In the arms of your pity.
Gather up in the arms of your love
Those who expect
No love from above.


Book of the moment: The Pursuit of Happyness by Chris Gardner
Music of the moment: "From Where You Are" by Lifehouse

Beacuse you know you wanted to know, you know

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought? Do I really have to go to work?
2. How much cash do you have on you? $20
3. What’s a word that rhymes with DOOR? Core
4. Favorite planet? Mars
5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone? Devan
6. What is your favorite ring tone on your phone? The twittery firefly one
7. What shirt are you wearing? White shirt
8. Do you label yourself? No, but other people do (I'm a “granola-eating, sandal-wearing, lavender-smelling tree-hugger” as my brother puts it :) lol)
9. Name the brand of the shoes you’re currently wearing? Converse
10. Bright or Dark Room? Dark with colored lights
11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you? I found it blank, so I guess they’re awesome to make a survey! lol
12. What does your watch look like? I am very hard on watches—I probably have 6 of them at least—but today I’m wearing one with a thick brown leather band, with flowers & vines pressed into it
13. What were you doing at midnight last night? I was asleep, but I was awake at 1
14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say? "What time are you starting the movie?"
15. Where is your nearest 7-11? About 2 blocks away
16. What's a word that you say a lot? “Indeed”
17. Who told you he/she loved you last? Devan
18. Last furry thing you touched? Stuffed toy dog
19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days? 0
20. How many rolls of film do you need developed? 3 or 4
21. Favorite age you have been so far? I’ve liked them all
22. Your worst enemy? Sleep
23. What is your current desktop picture? A picture from http://www.irenesuchocki.com/default4.asp
24. What was the last thing you said to someone? “Are we still going to lunch? Because either way, I'm still getting Chinese food."
25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be? The ability to fly
26. Do you like someone? I like everyone! But the only crush I have right now is for Orlando Bloom.
27. The last song you listened to? “Eyes” by Rogue Wave
28. What time of day were you born? About 6:15 a.m. on a rainy Friday, I think... but if not, it sounds like a great opener for a book.
29. What’s your favorite number? 8
30. Where did you live in 1987? CO
31. Are you jealous of anyone? No, should I be?
32. Is anyone jealous of you? Not that they’ve told me…
33. Where were you when 9/11 happened? At home eating breakfast and watching MSNBC
34. What do you do when vending machines steal your money? Kick them!!
35. Do you consider yourself kind? Yes
36. If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be? OM symbol, something in Sanskrit
37. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be? Italian, Russian, and Farsi
38. Would you move for the person you loved? Yes
39. Are you touchy feely? Sometimes, but not usually
40. What’s your life motto? “All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of things shall be well” ~Judith of Norwich
41. Name three things that you have on you at all times? Cell phone, money, and my knife
42. What’s your favorite town/city? Denver
43. What was the last thing you paid for with cash? Can't really remember... I don't use cash very often. It's nasty and germy. I think it was a book, though...
44. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it? A few months ago
45. Can you change the oil on a car? In theory, yes.
46. Your first love: what is the last thing you heard about him/her? Too bad he was gay!
47. How far back do you know about your ancestry? Around 1400 or so?...
48. The last time you dressed fancy, what did you wear and why did you dress fancy? I had a hot date! (just kidding. A date) It was a red silky shirt, heels, cute pants
49. Does anything hurt on your body right now? My chest
50. Have you been burned by love? Absolutely.

"Sometimes nothing can be a pretty cool hand."

Oh, let me sing the song of the joy of Ann's "Yoga For Yourself" dvd! Not only does it give you balance, strength, a sense of well-being, and the feeling that you're doing wonderful things for yourself, but it comes shipped to you in 2 days! (Oh, and it makes your legs look good, too.)

I have also found that after doing said yoga program, I sleep soundly (which I never do) and have dreams of Paul Newman (that's Cool Hand Luke for those of you who should have the finger of shame pointed at you for not knowing of the greatness of PN.).

But the main question remains: Can you truly achieve a near-Zen state in 23 minutes? I submit that you can! The closest I've come to Zen before this is trying to sit still for 2 minutes in front of the microwave while waiting for my popcorn to pop.

Anyway, it's great. Buy it. You know you want to.

Snack Pack pudding is God's little way of saying "Everything is going to be ok!"

So taking a cue from my older sister, Ann, I thought it was time to start keeping up with my blog again. And instead of signing in and out of all the others just to post a comment on hers, I figured I'd just start this one up again.

I'm working on a book--so far I've got up to Chapter 5 edited. It's not too shabby, if I do say so myself. I also enjoy drawing and painting (I was the kid sitting next to you in pre-school who liked playing with the fingerpaints as much as I liked eating them) and cooking. If I could cook all day long, I would be a very happy girl. Well, I am very happy anyway, so I guess I would happier :)

I'm very active politically (I'm a county delegate and have the White House on speed dial... yeah, you try rolling over on your phone in the middle of the night and accidently calling the WH switchboard operator... Oopsie!) and in my church.

Other than that, I like chocolate, pudding, chocolate pudding, and books. I think that's enough of me to get started. I'm glad we had this little chat.

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